“Maybe you should buy yourself a slimming one-piece swimsuit.”
That’s what the nurse told me. I was feeling discouraged after finding out, after a month of working out and eating right, that I had gained weight instead of losing it. I was told that my hormones and my new IUD were unlikely to let me shed weight any time soon. This whole discussion happened just after I purchased few new bikinis for our upcoming trip to Hawaii.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen many women rock one-pieces and I’ve always been so jealous. I have nothing against one-pieces — I just never find any that look good on me. I’m tall, and I’ve found very few that fit me well. So no, I won’t be rushing out to find a suit just to hide my not-so-perfect body at the moment. I never want to buy a suit because I “have” to, I want to buy a suit because I “want” to.
Here’s the bigger problem and question about this situation: Why does that number on the scale seem hold so much power over our self-confidence and body image? Why did my self-esteem instantly plummet? Why should I feel the need to hide anything? Before I stepped on the scale I felt healthier and stronger than I’ve felt in a long time, but as soon as I saw that number it all changed. I tried not to let the scale thwart my confidence, but it did. It put me in such a bad headspace and downward spiral that I just felt like giving up and packing away the bikinis I’d just bought.
On the drive home I calmed down, called my husband to vent, and made the decision that I’m not going to let that number affect my mood or my vacation. I will be wearing my new bikinis with all the confidence that I would have had if I had lost the weight I intended to lose. Confidence is key, and confidence is beautiful. Sometimes we don’t make our goals, and that is ok. I’m choosing to love my body no matter what stage of the journey it’s in and not let that number dictate how I feel about myself. Get ready Hawaii, I’m coming, with my bikinis, imperfections, and all!
How much does the scale number affect your mood and confidence?