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Working on Me

By January 3, 2021May 17th, 2021Lifestyle
working on me
Did you jump into 2021 wide eyed, bushy tailed, and excited to tackle the new year with a whole set of resolutions?  Or, like me, did you roll into 2021 a bit disheveled, disoriented, and wondering where the heck the holidays went? I did, excitedly, have a few “let’s do this” moments on New Year’s Eve, but I think those moments may have been the bubbly talking. I may have had a few glasses, but I admit nothing!
 
I’m not big into declaring New Year’s resolutions . I know myself too well to make any real, firm resolutions. I end up breaking them 5 to 7 days after making them, so what’s the point? Instead, I need to commit to something that can’t be broken, ignored, or put off. Instead of pesky resolutions I blow off, I’ve decided to write down a few “me” things to work on or growth I’d like to see, and here’s the important bit: I am not going to obsess over them.  They’re not something that need to be started right away or accomplished by a certain time. They are just a few investments in “me” I’d like to make in my life at the moment.
 
1. I want to start dreaming again.
 
I was always a big dreamer full of hope and optimism. Somewhere along the way I forgot about these dreams. Little by little, over time, my dreams have been replaced by the reality of life. Having dreams is what always sparked my passion and drove me forward.  Without these dreams I tend to feel lost, lose hope, and begin to accept the life unfolding in front of me. Not this year. This year I will dream again… and if life doesn’t like it, well, it can bite me. Without dreams I would’ve never experienced some of the most memorable parts of my life, and I wouldn’t be where I am now.  I am a result of my past dreams.
 
2. I want to take better care of myself.
 
Self-care is so important. No, it is critical. Unfortunately, self-care easily is the first to get pushed to the wayside when life gets busy or complicated. I used to make time for me. Time to work out… time to travel… time to just be alone with my thoughts. This was critical time… and it was a core contributor to the above mentioned dreams.  This year I am going to balance the “me” with the “them” and the “those” and the “what do you mean he was watching YouTube during class” moments. Taking some “me” time will likely benefit those other times, so win-win. I will be healthy of body and mind, I will be less stressed out, and I will have, God help me, focus.
 
3. I want to write and talk more about the things that are hard to write and talk about.
 
When I started this blog I planned to share more about my journey as a mom of kids with learning differences and different needs. I have found myself shying away from these posts. To get close to those topics you really have to go all-in emotionally and mentally… which brings everything right back up to the top. The stress, anxiety, and helplessness creep down your spine and right into your gut. More often than not I found  I wanted more to escape those feelings than to dive back in, deeper, and relive them in my thoughts.  In 2021 I will do less escaping.  I am learning that writing or talking about the harder topics can be a form of therapy. Plus, if what I write helps just one person, it will be worth it. These are shared experiences… and no one need go it alone. Sometimes knowing others have survived something is just what you need to take that next step.
 
I could have written about a 100 things I wanted out of 2021; however, three seems realistic and doable. I figure I can always add more because, unlike a resolution, these are just plans for “me.”  How about you? Is there anything in particular you will be working on this year? Let’s make good things happen, starting with us.

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